Sunday, February 17, 2013

Motherhood


Life with kids is hard.

It starts with the struggle of pregnancy. Sickness, fatness, pain.
Then they have to be pushed out. Yikes.
Then there is this newborn who is a mystery. Cries all the time. It's hard to figure out nursing, sleeping and pooping. Lots of runny poop that goes all over.
Those things seem to be a burden for way too long. Finally figuring out a schedule only to have your baby change and grow and need a new schedule.
Life gets planned around naps and feeding and bedtime- trying to keep a smile on that precious face.
Then they get mischievous. Color on walls, spill juice, milk, and boxes of new spaghetti noodles. Reach in toilets and eat food off a restaurant floor.
They refuse to poop for days as you try to teach them to go in a toilet. You deal with diaper rash and hemorrhoids.
Despite reading Parenting books all the time, discipline is a constant thing of worry. Am I doing too much? Am I doing enough? Why are they still so naughty? It's embarrassing to watch them be mean to their friends... or my friends... or me.
Then to have a school age child doesn't seem to end the constant stream of worry. Are her chronic stomach pains serious? Or anxiety? Is she talking enough that she has friends? Why after months of going to school does she still cry when it's time to leave me? And then there's still the pooping issues...

Obviously I've been reflecting on motherhood. Or rather- my children's childhood. And while these moments of hardness seem to last forever, it's good for me to remember that the moments of greatness make up for it. All of it.

Going in Veda's room first thing in the morning and have her jump up and down when she sees me.
Hearing Veda run to the door when Quinn gets home from school to hug and kiss her.
Catching them sharing fairly and nicely without being prompted by me.
Giggling with Hendrix as we run around the block together
Getting covered in kisses (and licks) from Veda.
Hearing from other parents in Quinn's class how amazing Quinn is. That they've watched her over the last few months and have seen how great and sweet and well behaved she is.
Knowing that when Hendrix is really sad, he just needs his mommy to hold him.
Watching them achieve something hard that they've worked for.
The look of Veda's face when it lights up when Dave gets home from work.
Knowing that I wouldn't trade these hard years EVER. I want to soak them up (and maybe do a little self medicating with chocolate and endorphins when things are especially hard).

8 comments:

Aaron, Whitney, and kids said...

I love this Amber. You expressed my thoughts about this time of our lives perfectly. But thanks for the reminder that its a good time that we should cherish and not wish away. You're a great example.

T-I-F-F-A-N-Y said...

So sweet and soo true! Love this post and love the picture, precious :o)

Lindsey said...

That was so well-written. I love your honesty and perspective.

Lindsay said...

i just love this post. and you. and your cute sweet family. i love your perspective and that you let it all out there. so refreshing.

Mom said...

Did I ever tell you that you're a great writer? You know how to express what you and a great many other Moms go through and can sum it all up with perspective and gratitude for the sweet little spirits those children are. Our children grow up and turn into decent human beings despite our efforts, lack of knowledge and imperfections. I love you and think you are doing a wonderful job and have wonderful beautiful children.

kelsey said...

My life definitely revolves around my children's sleep schedules. True true true. You're cute, and a great mom. I'm trying to "live in the moment" myself right now, because I know how quickly they grow out of the tiny stage! My goal right now is to spend lots of time with Norah before she leaves me for kindergarten!!! Weird.

Shawn AND Chelsey said...

well put am! but seriously, even tho it is hard, just know that i wish i was HALF as good a mom as you are! seriously! you are the best and your kiddos are lucky to have you! you're doing it all right, so don't worry about it! xoxoxo

Emily said...

You win the awesome award, my dear!